MICROSTRATEGY IS A BLAZING DEATH-STAR OF BITCOIN—AND THE LASER JUST GOT HOTTER.

Strategy (the artist formerly known as MicroStrategy) now squats on 580,955 BTC—that’s over half-a-million digital coins welded to its balance sheet. 

Michael Saylor just cranked the money-printer again, floating a fresh $1 BILLION stock offering to hoover up even more sats. 

The corporate mission? Crush a 25 % BTC-yield in 2025—stack coins faster than the halving can starve the market. 

10 GOD-MODE COMMANDMENTS FOR HYPER-PUMPING mNAV

  1. PRINT WHEN THE CROWD IS FOAMING.
    Sell paper (shares) at a premium, convert that hot froth straight into cold storage bitcoin. Dilution? Nah—each raise amplifies BTC per share because the price premium does the heavy lifting.
  2. DECAPITATE BAD DEBT.
    When the stock moons, force convertibles to equity. Debt evaporates, balance-sheet bloat melts away, and NAV rockets.
  3. BUY THE DIP, BUY THE RIP, BUY EVERYTHING.
    Weekly DCA? Cute. Strategy shotgun-buys billions on red candles. Every satoshi captured is a future lever of compound dominance.
  4. LOCK THE TREASURY—NO FORCED SALES, EVER.
    Liquidity buffers and fixed-rate notes mean zero margin calls. The stash lives, breathes, and multiplies—untouchable.
  5. TURN SOFTWARE INTO A CASH-FLOW SIDE QUEST.
    MicroStrategy ONE + AI = recurring SaaS money that pays the light bill while Bitcoin does the heavy lifting.
  6. ACQUIRE LIKE A CYBORG.
    Bolt on lightning-network startups, AI analytics ninjas, and any team that adds speed or signal. Pay with over-valued equity; keep the BTC intact.
  7. PREACH THE GOSPEL.
    Saylor on X, at conferences, on every mic within earshot: “Bitcoin is hope. Strategy is the vessel.” Narrative is NAV rocket fuel.
  8. TIME THE MACRO SWELLS.
    Rates fall? Issue debt. ETF hype peaks? Issue equity. Bear market gloom? Scoop sats on discount. Surf every cycle, never drown.
  9. SHOW THE NUMBERS—LOUDLY.
    Real-time dashboards of BTC per share, cost basis, unrealized gain. Radical transparency magnetizes diamond-handed capital.
  10. HODL UNTIL THE UNIVERSE BLINKS.
    The master plan is simple: Increase bitcoin per share forever. If BTC rips to infinity, mNAV becomes god-tier infinity².

Bottom line: Strategy is more than a company—it’s a self-replicating Bitcoin organism. Keep printing stock, keep nuking debt, keep inhaling sats, and keep shouting the vision. Market Net Asset Value doesn’t just climb; it goes supernova.

Strap in, keep stacking, and watch the Death-Star fire again.